Hey Numb-Nuts! Drive Much?
Ah yes, the things our fellow motorists do that drive us crazy! “Numb-nuts” (is that hyphenated?) is certainly one of my more mild exclamations when calling out another driver’s on road ineptitude. In fact, most of my exclamations are way more, shall we say, saucy. Okay, make that R-Rated. Vulgar at times, often accompanied by unfriendly gesticulations. Just part of my overall driving experience most days. I have a mighty arsenal of “Driving Only” vernacular which is unfit for most use outside of the confines of a vehicle. Carlin’s seven dirty ones are of course in there, but they are just the tip of the iceberg. How else does one bear witness to the shear lack of motoring ability demonstrated by so many operators? The driver who must make a left turn across six lanes of oncoming traffic, when it would be faster to go around the block, or six blocks? And why merge into traffic when you can just come to a complete stop at the end of the acceleration-lane and wait for a break in traffic no shorter than a half mile? That maneuver has dumped a lot of hot lattes on the floorboard. Another award-winner, the person who meditates on the turn-arrow so long it expires before anyone else can get through. Buy that man a Blue Ribbon! Or, a nice swift kick in the fog-lamps. I’m sure you have your own pet peeves, and you can see how they match-up to those in the story below. I’ve a few more, but lunchtime is approaching, and since I’m heading to the other side of town for a bite I’ll wrap this up now. Who knows, I may end up behind that guy who is positive the citywide speed limit is 35mph. Happy motoring!