January 19th is National Popcorn Day, maybe you heard me mention that on-air. A day to celebrate coworkers who try to fumigate the break-room by forgetting they have some cooking in the microwave. Tough job for the strongest of scented candles to cover up. But the fact that it’s an actual “Official Day” according to the Ministry of Official Days, which is not to be confused with the Ministry of Alternative Days, which is headed by the Czar of Reality Manipulation, (just so we’re clear on the technicalities) the fact that it does exist inspired me to look a bit deeper, down into the murkiest and most obscure depths of “Day-Days.” I found a National Day Calendar, not recognized or sanctioned in any way by the aforementioned Ministries, but it’s on the internet, the absolute gold-standard of total truthfulness in all things, if you don’t count presidential tweets. I missed January 16th, National Nothing Day. A day when Americans can sit without celebrating, honoring or observing anything. Think I’ll observe that tomorrow. National Bubble-Wrap Appreciation Day is on the 29th, along with Corn Chip and Puzzle Day. It’s a three-fer that day, so get the gang together to work crosswords, eat chips and salsa and wrestle on bubble-wrap! If you ordered anything on-line over the holidays, I bet you still have some of that stuff around. Fun to finger and cheaper than a fidget-spinner. (those things a sure sign of the total embrace of stupidity characteristic of the past year, but that’s another blog entirely) January 21st is Squirrel Appreciation Day. Don’t tell your dog. January 23rd is Handwriting Day and I’m all for that one. I still jot a note in cursive now and again. Youngsters think it’s Czechoslovakian. I find it to be very expressive, a more personal, written eloquence. Four big reasons to pop-a-top on Jan 24th: National Beer Can Appreciation Day, (just the vessel, the liquid has its own day) Compliment Day, Peanut Butter Day and Library Shelfie Day. Explore and photograph all the amazing and artistic ways the spines of books can be organized. Sorry, I’m scheduled for a seminar on watching paint dry. I’ll wrap up with this Saturday, the 2oth. It’s another triple-shot: National Buttercrunch Day, Cheese Lovers Day and National Disc Jockey Day. Please, don’t send a card. Or a buttercrunch cheeseball. Enjoy your weekend, I’ll blog atcha later !
Did somebody mention squirrels???